My Sister's boyfriend...
If I could get a heavenly pardon from the good lord above for my terrible sin, I probably would do it...
Wow, Reading that which I've just written is heavy on my heart because it is so not who I am...
I don't really have a violent bone in my body... I cry when I see anything or anyone get physically abused...
But this guy... UGHHHHH!!!! the feeling of hurt, the pain that i pray for him to endure... that I wish upon him... frightens me...
I have imagined so many scenario's...
There's one where I have approached him, disguising my appearance and telling him I am involved with an interested party that would be willing to pay him a significant amount of money if he "LEFT TOWN" never to return again...
Or, I have hired a private investigator who has many incriminating photo's of him and his shenanigans... getting high on anything he can get his hands on, out in public and abusing my sister or her son, or any single shred of evidence I could use to blackmail him with to convince him that he either leaves my sister, never to remember her name, or I go to his probation officer and reveal just how the penal system might need this terrible excuse for a human being back behind their bars...
Ooh!!! The level of hate within me... I feel like I need to go take a shower and wash it off but I sincerely cannot help how I feel about this man...
Of course the most recent events are... We find out she's pregnant with his child...
The extreme agony i feel over this situation... This will always bind her to this despicable man...
I have often wished since hearing the news that he would just be the type sleazy man that he is and run into the arms of some skank that he feels would suffice him and not have the extra burden of walking around with his child in their belly...
Not the chance... He's probably loving every moment of my family's extreme frustration in this whole debacle...
My poor little sister, once so beautiful, with a halo of purity only she could possess, the always joyful and contented look of how much she enjoys life...now ruined because of being clueless and supposedly "in love" with this imbecile... destined to become old and haggard long before her time,at the hands of this human being that I only wish would disappear...
Oh how the web of life is such that we can get so tangled up, we haven't the slightest idea of how to begin our desperate attempt to survive...
God, please give me the grace and forgiveness for my evil thoughts... That they will soon pass through my body and free me from the prison I have made for myself... allowing this hatred to fill up my heart...
Peace,
Denise
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