Life in Limbo...

And so we have it that Denise's world is not so Fabulous lately...

"S" is in a shitty mood lately and basically I think I'm not realizing that even though he and I match so well on most things, the truth is that we are 1000 miles apart and that isn't going to change anytime soon...

I hate to have invested so much time in him and I know that my heart will ache but I need to say "Goodbye" to him... Man I don't really want to... But the two month mark just passed so I guess I'm overdue...

Plus he pissed me off today with his rather crappy attitude...Case in point our latest phone conversation!


me: What's wrong with you today?

him: I'm just crabby.

me: Well, you want me to let you go?

him: No not right now, well, yeah whatever you wanna do!

me: Whatever I want to do?

him: Yeah whatever you want.

me: Ya know what? Fuck you S! (Click)


He gets in a bad mood and takes the shit out on me... The fact of the matter is he is MEAN AS HELL and SMOKES TOO MUCH, AND MEAN .. and... GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR...

HE CAN FUCK OFF!

"Whew"... I needed that...

Sorry folks... I'm just venting cause what else is there to do when you sit at home usually taking every moment you have free to spend with someone waiting for them to get with you either on the phone or the net because that is all you can do since your heart is devoted totally to a man living so far away...

SUCKSSSSSSSSSS... I had no idea this would be so freaking hard to live with...

Ok so... The above was written on MONDAY and today is Tuesday...

I'm in a better mood and "S" and I are not raising hell with one another anymore for now...

Don't get me wrong, I know for certain there will be more to come in the next hundred years with this man because we butt heads worse than rams in the field but above all things y'all, I am so in love with him... No, I don't know exactly why...

DAMN HE PISSES ME OFF AND I SWEAR I WISH I COULD JUST TELL HIM TO FUCK OFF BUT SOMETHING KEEPS BRINGING ME BACK TO HIM...

Ok Lemme just whine about everything going on and then I'll go away for a few more days or so... Here goes...

My car's "check engine" light is on and I am freaking out...
My Boyfriend's brain is cluttered with bad shit making him a major asshole...
My rent is past due...
I NEED SOME SEX...
I WANT SOME SEX...
I LOVE "S" AND I DON'T WANT TO HAVE SUCH A HASSLE AS "being in love" creates!

ughhhhhhhhh lemme go.. sorry about all the whining y'all...

I'll be better another day!

Peace to you and me too!

Denise