Love Hate Love relationship...

"S" drives me completely insane...

One minute he is precious and sweet and I can't get enough of him but in the next moment he can change into this man who thinks he knows every single fucking piece of information that was ever deciphered into human language, and no one can offer him any help or suggestions on anything...

Anyway so this weekend...

He would capture photos of me on the webcam and then send them to me so I could edit them from RTF's to JPG's and resend them back to him...

Well, for any of you that happen to know "print screen", you know it will capture any type of window you have opened and in this instance I not only received his webcam picture at the time and my picture at the time, but also his Messenger list... Who just happened to have 20 names on it and from scanning down the list, I can definitely say most of them were WOMEN...

I freaked out...

At the start of our first conversation, he told me that, "HE had me on his friend's list and that I must have been important because he doesn't have too many people on his friend's list"...

Hmmm...

LIE LIE LIE... Long story short, after constant bickering and him finally offering an apology, all is well back up in "denise's house"...

I do have this bad habit of when I don't like what someone's doing or saying to me, I shut down and hide... Mostly by way of Hanging up the phone...

Since "S" and I have met, I have probably hung up the phone 25 times in the month that we've known each other... He doesn't seem to like this at all... I think I've mentioned previously that it used to be him calling me right back to fix things... But now, he doesn't... I DO NOT LIKE THIS AT ALL... He will need to readjust his thinking and return to my way of doing things if he wants to keep me (mmmhmmm!)...

I really am so immature in this relationship with him but y'all, in my defense, I gave him all the ammonition he needed to run away from this before it got too far into it and he didn't run away... All he seems to do is laugh and tell me how positively adorable I am...

GRRRRRRRRRR... that is not the effect I am looking for...

Ok let me stop lying, I love the fact that he loves me unconditionally...

Alright so let's move on...

In Summarization, We argue alot... He doesn't listen to shit that I try and suggest to him... Sometimes he acts like he's listening, but in the end he'll do what he wants to do anyway... DRIVES ME UP THE FUCKING WALL...

What's ironic is that I am the same damn way... Do not tell me how to do something I damned well know how to do... But... I will listen to what you say to me concerning something I don't know about but then I will usually put my own spin on it as the end result...

I know y'all are sitting there asking yourselves, "WHAT THE HELL IS THIS POST ABOUT Denise?"

Shit, upon reviewal of what I've written thus far, I don't have a clue either... I'm just writing shit that comes to mind...

I think I mentioned that "S" and I stay up on most evenings until like 4 or 5 am... This has gotten me to work needless to say very late because I sleep through my alarm clock... So I composed the following letter to my boss but "S" told me not to dare send it to her because it will not gain me anything except probably a definite excuse to fire me...

Let me give a little background: Times late on my 2004 Evaluation: 78
Times late on my 2005 Evaluation: 57
Times late on my 2006 Evaluation: I think I've already went past the 78... Shit I'm in trouble... My boss has already verbally told me twice this year to get my ass to work on time...

Anyway, Read on: Emphasis added for affect...

Dear Bosslady,

I am submitting this to you in hopes that it may have some bearing before you decide to terminate me for extreme tardiness.

Granted, there is no excuse for insubordination, I’m pleading with you because I really do not want to get fired and ask that you might see my plight.

I met someone really great and the problem is that he works 9am to 9pm six days a week plus being that he is in Texas, it is an hour difference. By the time he gets home at night, it is after midnight my time here in SC.

We talk to one another each night as if we are talking for the first time never running out of things to say to each other and before we know it, it’s after 2 or 3am (more like 4 or 5 but I aint telling her that) before we hang up the phone with each other. After today (being Friday August 25) and waking up to find that I’ve slept through the alarm once again, (4th time in 2 weeks), I am giving you my sincere promise that I am going to stop this addiction praying that it is not too late.

I know that before this, I was late on numerous occasions (135 time in last 2 years)but never over half an hour as in lately... When you would ask me what the problem was, I knew there was no excuse so I didn’t want to bother trying to come up with one. Now I have a reason to tell you even if it can’t be used as very legitimate.

Bosslady, in summarization, please, please, bear with me and know that I really do not want to get fired because I love my job (yes folks, I am bored to death most days and some of the people here drive me batty, but I do actually love my job) and am at this moment blinded by the giddiness of “New Love” (GIDDY GIDDY GIDDY) but also know, that out of respect and consideration, I will without a doubt, submit my two weeks notice as much as I do not want to avoid having such a blemish of being terminated on my record.

Thank you for listening to my plea.

Sincerely, (I'm really sincere y'all)

Denise

People, It's monday and Ya damn well better know that I got my ass here 30 minutes early today...

I await for the wrath to fall upon me because I suspect that since the office manager was off today, she'll be in full force tomorrow to tell "Bosslady" how many friggin times I was late last week while she was on vacation...

Well, I wrote the above this morning and now it is late evening when I am finishing up this post...

"S" and I just argued again and we argue about the most stupidest things...

Oh fuck it, I'll write about it later... He's hung up the computer on me and won't talk to me... FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!!

He's such a baby sometimes...

Update on Married Man coming... Saw him at the gym tonight and he emailed me a note today...

Be well!

Denise