Well, I am back,
Not much has changed except My latest and I are still together and I wanted to write a little more about she and I.
So as I said she started working in my office about March of 2021, I did not find her very appealing on my first impression as the boss took her to each persons office to introduce her. She saw pictures on my wall of my dogs and Keith and Sara and made a nice comment about them though I cannot remember now what she said. So fast forward to one day we were out doing our job going to peoples houses and I remember waiting in the car for her to get done on her side of the street and saying, “Damn, she is sooo slow!”… But we kept going out together to work and one day on our lunch at a diner, I told her how I was always attracted to women, and though I was not looking to change my living situation I would be willing to have a friends with benefits. It was a couple days later I think, or it could have been the same night to us meeting up at a restaurant after work one evening and having a couple drinks I moved to her side of the booth, held her hand, flirting with who I thought was just my shy girl! We left to go outside to sit in my car and I started playing some music of my favorite singer LP and in talking she said she had never heard of her and did not particularly care for her singing! “AGAST” it kinda hurt my feelings but anyway a little bit later as she was getting out of my car, she stepped back in to kiss me and said,” Why do I need to be the one?” Which the whole thing if you ask me was awkward as crap and she in my opinion was so rigid that it turned me off. So when I got home, I will not lie, I did go to Serg and kiss him and say, something like “oh man, women are weird, I do love you”… I had told him a watered down version of what was going on and called him upon leaving work that day that I was going to meet up with her and cannot remember it all, but he knew something because he knew in all our years together that I liked girls. So I went to my room to change into my pj’s and started texting her that I did not think we would be a good match as she had a motorcycle which I am terribly against due to them being deathtraps, and her political and religious views did not line up with mine! I said I would like to just be friends. Anyway we spoke on the phone and then hung up. The next day at work she had been out of the office but when she returned that afternoon, I texted her to come to my office, as it was strange the whole day all I thought about was her and how attracted I was to her. Fuck, I do not know what happened but it was true and when she sat down beside at my office desk I rolled my chair to hers and cupped her face and kissed her tongue and all! I told her what I was feeling and that night we went out after work to a golf simulator place as she is a huge golf player! We went to her house afterwards and I remember her saying, “Do you wanna go inside?” I did not know what the hell she was talking about, she is originally from Vermont and I guess thats a Northern thing but hey, If going inside meant aanything to be near that pussy, I certainly was in! So we went to the bedroom and I remember her omg she was all over me frantically kissing me and wow it was fabulous and we carried on just like that for about… 60 days…
So as it was, the first of our days were going to work, dying to see each other, sneaking glances at each other during lunch breaks amongst our coworkers. Being sneaky I know now was part of the thrill! One day, early on, like within the first week or two, Serg decides he is not with it anymore and threatens me that he is going to get me and her both fired by calling our boss! We freak out and I tell him I wont see her anymore etc but that wouldnt do, he called my family and whomever else he had their phone numbers to put me on blast and demanded that she and I meet him to have a talk! We did, at the same restuarant where she and I had went, as he was barking at us, I remember saying amongst all the downgrading he was doing to me, “Can I say something?” to which she adamantly said, “Of course you can, this is not a trial!” I knew maybe not because of those words but I knew then that I was in love with her, and she became the most beautiful woman I ever saw! When we were walking out to the parking lot after our scolding from Serg and he had said he was done and was not going to pursue hurting us anymore, I started driving home because I figured she was done because as we were walking out she was crying and said, “I feel awful, he really loves you”! On my way home she texted and said, “I cannot believe you are just going home to him”. then sent me a song. I left several voice mails and msgs that I only wanted to go to her.. that I was going home to get some clothes and hoped she would answer the door… I could go on with my story of romanticism and maybe it was all just in my head as I have all these writings perhaps of grand delusion but I am writing what happened and what I was feeling.. Wow was it a whirlwind of drama, excitement, and chaos and I drank every bit of it… Until my cup started being less and less full! More next time.. I started writing today because of my dream and I promise to get there, reality is calling me and the dogs are ready for dinner!
God please fix me!
Denise
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