I was wanting to tell of my crazy dream I had last post but I got carried away so really quick, if I now can remember it all. Shit, all I can remember now is I was riding a bicycle which broke down and LP and her friends had shown up and it was so super surreal that of all people it was her that came to my rescue, who told me to follow them to this place and anyway it will not make much sense except skipping to the end, my current love had set it up exactly this way so she would be there waiting with a ring to officially propose to me! I know, crazy and really stupid because this old brain cannot remember the substance of the dream but I do remember waking up laughing and so happy and telling her about it.
So here it is, the first day of 2024… I was supposed to have died March 2, 2016 the night I was coughing up pints of blood and going into a Coma until they could stabilize me enough to wake me up!
Almost 8 years more of life I have been given. Fuck I hope somewhere, somehow I have made just a tiny bit of difference in someone’s life! My woman tells me I have, today in fact when i sent her a text from the other room in our house mind you. I told her
“to my sweetheart with whom I carry in my heart… Thank you for our 3rd year bringing in the new year together! I hope 2024 is a great year full of Love and Happiness… love you”
to which she replied,
“And thank you for every day because without you I would be no good. I hope we have a great year together.”
We live in a bubble if I have not mentioned it, just us two with our two dogs, a yorkie mix named Doobie who came with me into the mix, and Stevie, her jack russell. We recently added an orange calico who showed up on our back deck who after months of trying to gain her trust, now is of course in love with my beautiful and exceptionally always warm girlfriend. Oh, and her name is LuLu…
So yes, we live in our little cocoon with very little interaction of the outside world other than work and occasional calls from the kids and other family and friends. We are ok with it except I worry and I know she does as well, of what happens when one of us dies? Me being the highest potentially due to my health and her not having any health concerns at all.
We or SHE will be all alone and that scares me and makes me so sad, she is such a quiet, shy but very kind and lovely woman who I would hate to leave on this Earth lonely. I know she would be fine eventually without me, but oh man, I would be soooo devastated if I lost her.
anyway cannot dwell right now, I hope my kids have a great year and hope she and I have another year of being in our own little safe world… Need to plan our next trip!
Gods Peace!